The Golden Globe Nominations

As a film and television buff, and someone generally fascinated by celebrities and their fabulous lives, I usually look forward to the release of a list of nominations for a Hollywood awards show like a baseball fan might eagerly anticipate the release of a new player, uh, list.  Or something.

The Golden Globes are an exception to many rules, though, and this is no exception.  It’s a strange ceremony to say the least.  Television is combined with film in a nauseating heap of overrated talent, and after everyone’s done congratulating themselves for what is really merely adequate acting, directing or even writing (we’re up in three categories), it’s been like eight hours and nothing interesting has happened.  They’re kind of the loser awards, but occasionally this allows them to reward actors, films and especially writers that they know aren’t getting jack from the Oscars any time soon.  And sometimes that influences how the Oscar people vote.  So that’s cool.  And of course there is the fact that they split up Comedy and Drama, which would be a great move for the Oscars, but I hate that they combine musical and comedy, especially on a year like this, where Dreamgirls is up against movies I like in a bunch of categories, and everyone’s wetting themselves about Dreamgirls. And yes, a few years ago they used to have some ‘wacky’ occurrences every year (Christine Lahti missing her acceptance because she was in the bathroom, Jim Carrey sayin’ funny stuff, Jack Nicholson sayin’ funny stuff), but I don’t see what the big to-do is; it’s not a Friar’s Club roast of Hugh Hefner, it’s some light, Leno-style humor that would not feel out of place on The View.  In any case, this past wackiness was more due to the Golden Globe people’s odd habit, now more suppressed, to keep the camera rolling when the drunkies got on stage.  I’m not making this up, the Golden Globes actually are known for how drunk everyone gets at them, like the office Christmas party, or a Wednesday night at Liz and Laura’s apartment.

But all that aside, in the end the Golden Globes are still the awards show that always gets picked last for dodgeball, and here at LizandLaura.com, we’re all about the little guy.  So that said, here are my only thoughts on this year’s Golden Globe nominations.

*Brad Pitt nominated for Babel
He’s hot.

*Borat and Sacha Baron Cohen nominated
Weird.  But I think he ought to win.  Who else wrestled a large, hairy, naked man for their art?  I’d like to see Ben Affleck pull that off.  Well, actually, scratch that, I already saw Daredevil.  (Laura shudders, recalling Jennifer Garner’s terrifying man face)  Speaking of which…

*Ben Affleck?
What is the world coming to?  Doesn’t anyone remember Jersey Girl?  (Laura shudders, remembering Jersey Girl).

*I’m in love with Big Love!
It’s awesome that they got nominated, along with Bill Paxton, who really works his ass off on that show, what with all the pretending to have sex with ladies.  This show rules.  But it sucks that none of the wives got nominated.  Maybe the Golden Globe committee thinks what they’re doing is wrong.

*Weeds.  Heh heh heh.
It’s a show about weed and I haven’t seen it.  This is unfortunate.  But since I want Big Love to win, I guess I can’t vote for the pot show.  And I guess the lead pot selling chick is cool and everything, but I think she’s up against Edie Falco, and isn’t The Sopranos ending?  Yeah, I think Edie should win.  Sorry, Weeds.

*On the ‘Best Miniseries or TV Movie’ Category
Does anybody give a shit?  I mean, like one person?  I don’t think so.  They should get rid of this category and let us all go home a little early.  I say this because I will of course be at the Golden Globes.  I’m gonna win, dammit!  But anyway, when there happens to be a TV movie I actually like (see for example Spring Break Shark Attack, Locusts, and of course, Riding on the Bus With My Sister, or, as I call it, The Rosie O’Donnell Story), they don’t stand a chance against some dry drama about a queen, or somebody with autism, or an autistic queen.  Booooring.