Getting Dressed for Job Interviews

There’s something so satisfying about preparing for a job interview, despite the stressful nature of those pre-interview hours. You shower and shave, put on some makeup or whatever, and then it’s like you’re playing dress-up. Depending on what job you go to, you’ll accessorize more or less conservatively, wear hip sneakers versus black leather pumps, etc.. And sometimes you go to two completely different types of interview two days in a row, and find yourself changing your very attitude, nay, getting into character. Suddenly it feels more like play acting than reality, and you find yourself wondering if you can keep up some of these charades, like the secretarial position at the Catholic elementary school, or the receptionist job at the snooty law firm (or any place with lots of Stiffly Stiffersons). Some of these listings actually state as a requirement that you be good looking. Isn’t that illegal or something? Most of them just use the euphemism “extremely polished” instead.

Still, there is something so satisfying about choosing the accesories you think most emphasize the you that you want to represent. It’s like getting ready for an extremely conservative date, which is why I strongly believe that alcohol should be provided at all job interviews, to break the ice. You wouldn’t expect some banker you met on Match.com to spew out his life story in fifteen minutes while sober, would you? Or, for those not so alcoholically inclined, I kind of like the weird shit Google does to recruit on campus (see link), but then again they probably still won’t hire you unless you’re, like, Gandhi. Sigh.